What Attracts More Than People’s Attentions
Before some people started dating, one of the things that bothered them was the way they look. Some always felt that they were too fat, too short, and too unattractive to ever get the attention of the opposite sex. Some people’s motto were always, “life begins twenty pounds from now” or “life begins after I get washboard abs”. Some never thought of just asking a girl out and take it from there.
However, when some actually started dating, they had realized that it was not necessarily about the way they look more than anything. It was more of having the courage to take the first step and presenting themselves as the best person that they can be. Sure, physical appearances do get people’s attentions however a nice profile, high cheekbones, or a well-shaped nose don’t really maintain people’s attentions for long. It was their personality and attitude that created the bonds.
In a 1997 study by Merahbian and Blum where they studied the things that men and women find attractive, they found out that the most attractive features that women find in men were actually changeable. By changeable, this meant that the attractive features hold a certain degree of control for men. This feature was “self-care”. What this means for most of us guys is in order for us to be found attractive by women, we have to exercise proper grooming (We need to take care of ourselves—bathe regularly, brush our teeth, style our hair), have good posture (A good posture connotes confidence. A bad one just screams “I don’t care” and “I can’t be bothered), dress well (We don’t have to be fashionistas however we just have to make sure that our clothes fit well, look well-maintained, and the style shouldn’t clash like swords in a medieval battlefield).
Lastly and more importantly, the study showed that attitude attracts people and keeps them connected to us. Being pleasant, nice, and having a positive attitude can overshadow any of our perceived flaws.
How we look attracts people. But looks only go so far. If we put effort in being presentable and have a good attitude about it, people will take notice and would want to know us better.
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